Measuring time....

I saw something on Facebook today that made me think of you, but then again, that is not new.  I think of you everyday.  In just about every aspect of life, I find myself thinking "What could have been or what would you be doing or who would you be today".  I find myself measuring time from the time you left.  When I think about life back then, it is always thought about either before you died or after you died.  Our life as we knew it changed that day and its like a whole new life started the day you left.  Although there are many positive things that happen in this new life, I would give them all back for our life with you in it. I look at life as a gift now, where before I may have taken it for granted.  I appreciate things more now, where before I may not have noticed them, BUT, I would rather have you and figure that all out in a different way.  Why did your death have to be part of the lesson we are learning in this life?  There will never be an answer that is good enough for me....Its been almost 2 years since you died son and I find myself thinking about what we were doing this time, 2 years ago...I miss you more than words could ever describe...this time measurement without you seems eternal...it's Hell and it will only end when I can stop measuring, when we are together once again.